Well,talking about this is so awkward for me. Why? I don't want to talk about what happened to us.After all,I'm over him.But I have no choice. I need to write a blog. So here is the story.....
I still remember that first time we first talked,Friday night. We're riding on the same jeep that night.While riding on the jeep we're talking of just thing. Know what? Duh,Basketball. He talked about PBA,PBA players and all those basketball stuffs. Me? I just nodded to all the things that he was said.From that day on,he then started to invite me to go home with him. You know,have some talks so he'll not get bored riding the jeep.So since my best pal changer her route(I have no one to talk to),I just agreed.Just to tell you the truth guys,I really feel bored when I'm with him cause of all the things to talked,why does it have to be basketball always?. I cant do anything about it...so I just go with the flow. After one week, I discovered that we're eating in the same carenderia.But I was shocked when he just ignored me. I guess the reason is he's shy with my friends.As days go by,I just discovered my self eating in the same table with him.From that day on,we go home together,eat lunch together and talk during computer time. Through those thing,I knew him.About his family,The tragedies that happened to him.Then I realized,I have a "feeling for him".
As days pass by,that "feeling" became stronger and deeper.One time,while we're sitting at the waiting shed,he opened the topics about crushes. He asked me who my crush is,I told him that he didn't know the guy.Then he told me bout his. At first,I felt OK.She's his crush.So what?. But I didn't expect him to ask me for help. He told me that he wanted to talk to her.Since we're close friends and there is no reason for me to say no,I agreed.I talked to the girl and told her that somebody wants to know you.Luckily she said "yes".After that day,one of my present best friends knew my deepest secret. I really cant deny to her that I was not hurted(I just told her the whole story since I know she can keep secrets). Many weeks after,my secret began to spread to the whole classroom. I was shocked. Who the h*** told these people about my secret? I asked them. They said it was obvious. But I tried my best to deny.^_^ I don't want our friendship to be broken.Unfortunately,he believed to the paparazzi.He started to going home late and eating with his boy pals. I was really hurted. Just because he knew I have a crush on him?,for Pete's sake.I tried to save our friendship.Sad to say,it's only me who wants it.
Feb.13,2006,the day my heart broke into pieces.We went to Madame Gallo's house for some sort of reasons.Then we went home after.While walking,I was shocked when I saw him walking beside me.I didnt react.I just ignored him as if I didnt see anyone. A few minutes after, he started talking.He asked me what thins will he give to her.I just answered him with a simple answer.Good thing he didnt notice the change in my voice.After answering his questions.he just disappered at my side. I feel sad . He is taking advantage of the fact that whatever he ask from me I will always say yes.I was so mad at my self.But I realized,I cant do anything about it,I LOVE him. That was the saddest Valentine's DAy ever in my life.
That was the start of my agony.It's a long story of bitterness. Sacrificing our friendship for love is the most regretful thing that I've done.If only I knew..........but it was too late.
"What makes friendship special is the way each one remembers the other when they are apart. They miss the talks, the laughs & the times they were together. Life changes; memories don't."
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